I’m 28 years old today. At first I didn’t want to celebrate at all- I was too busy looking back at everything bad that has happened in my 27th year, and was adamant that nothing was going to change. That everything this year would be just as bad, if not worse than last year. I let Satan get into my head space and kick me in my insecurities about my relationship with God. I then let Satan manipulate all the negative emotions toward every unhappy situation I was dealt in the past 365 days. I let my fears take over and hid instead of standing up and embracing my faith.
I’m not going to let this consume me. I’m going to trust God and give this to Him. I know that He had a reason for every “bad thing” that happened to me not just in this past year, but in my whole life. I need to remember that I can not see the big picture, I can only see the pieces of my purpose as God places them on my heart.
There is a paraphrasing of the last half of Esther 4:14 that is catching like wildfire lately and I honestly have no idea who came up with it and I have scoured Google looking for an answer. Anyway it goes like this: “Perhaps this is the moment for which you have been created.” Esther is, for the most part, one of my favorite stories in the Bible. Let me summarize for a second.
Esther is chosen by the king to be his new wife because of her beauty. The king’s right hand guy Haman didn’t like Esther’s cousin Mordecai and then came up with a master plan to get rid of all the Jews because Mordecai was a Jew. Mordecai reaches out to Esther and God uses him to call her out saying that saving her family, her people may be the reason God placed her in the kingdom as queen. This rattled Esther- why would God trust her with such a huge part in history (there you go ladies, even Esther was insecure) and should she risk her life to save her people. Esther decides to trust God, tells her husband who gets super mad and in turn kills Haman. It goes on from there and seriously, spend some time reading Esther.
So this is my resolve. My 28th year I’m going to trust God. I’m going to listen when He places something on my heart and follow Him. Will I make mistakes? OF COURSE. I am resolving to live my life in a such a way that I am trusting God for all the moments He has created me for. I’m going to live Esther 4:14 to the best of my ability. This year when battles come and storms rage, I’m going to say that this may be why God placed me on this earth for this moment. Then reach for His arms and rely on Him for victory.