Today I was checking my Facebook, and on my news feed was a message from a diner that I didn’t get to a ton in my adult life, but some of my fondest childhood memories were over a plate of chocolate chip pancakes there. The message was that their doors were closed, and not just for the day, but unless someone buys it and keeps it the same, forever. We didn’t get there a lot because it was almost two hours away from the house I grew up in. But there would be times on vacation from school where mom and my step dad would wake the family up at four am to drive the two hours to have breakfast at the Muffin Patch bright and early in the morning. Before I knew it, I was in the middle of reading this post and I was actually crying. When did I get so sensitive- crying over a diner closing because the owners wanted to retire? I realized what was going on almost as quickly as it took for me to break down in tears- one more memory and nostalgic place of dad was being closed.
As I’ve said, my step dad was the best human father I could have ever prayed for. He grew up on the farm and had a love of food and adventure that he shared with us. There are tons of diners and food places that he made special to us that have closed since he passed in 2012, why should the Muffin Patch be any different?
It’s different because I’m different. When other food places closed, Top of the Hill in Fulton, Danzer’s in Syracuse, I was still bitter about my step dad’s passing. I was still bitter about a lot of things. I’ve become a young woman who accepts my emotions more instead of hiding them away. I’ve traded my sadness and pain over losing my dad over to allow God to fill my heart with joy.
A year ago even, hearing of this diner filled with personal nostalgia would have wrecked me and I would have been in my feelings for days about it. Crying over something I could not get back and withdrawing myself from present life. Today, I spent about ten minutes in my feelings. I did not let losing a place of nostalgia and fond memories change who I wanted to be today. I prayed thanking God for reminding me of some beautiful times and asked Him to bless the retirement of the owners, and moved on with my life.
Lots of people have lost loved ones. Grief affects us all differently. Because of God really changing my life over the past year and teaching me how to give Him my burdens, today was a day of victory and not a day of retreats.
Do you feel overwhelmed sometimes? Does a bad day or a sad day come out of no where and debilitate you? Give it to Him. He can use all things for His good. I’ve sad this before and I’ll say it again, God wants your baggage. Let Him lighten your load and fill you with joy so that He can use you for your purpose.
Read: Psalm 30.
-Trading My Sorrows (Lincoln Brewster)
-Oh, Me of Little Faith (Matthew West)
-Every Single Tear (Scott Krippayne)
-I’m Not Who I Was (Jeremy Camp)